Wednesday, November 30, 2011

On Teaching


The students sit apart in rows.  An 8-page; two-sides per page midterm is on each of their desks.  Sure only 17 of the enrolled 31 are here (though keep in mind the peek attendance is only 24), but they are here.  A few of them looked worried during the beginning.  So, I went over and told them each to relax; the psychology student that I am.

But here’s the good news.  They’re trying.  Even the kid that never participates or even cares, wrote down answers.  And this is a good feeling: watching them try.  Every now and then a head pops up with concern.  The eyes roll around the room and then---a slight smile!  The head almost nods before returning to look at the test.

And that’s the moment that I smile.  I smile because I taught them that.  I taught them this knowledge that their being tested on.  We’ve gone over psychology’s history, approaches, research methods, the brain, the nervous system, the endocrine system, neurotransmitters, nature v. nurture, evolutionary psychology, and more!  And this is that moment where I realize that SOME of what I said has been absorbed.  They’ve learned! Which makes me a teacher!

Even if none of them pass, what is right on the paper is still new information for them.  Thus, in a small way, I have succeeded…because their pencils and pens are still moving.  The exam is 61 questions plus an essay on nature and nurture.  They’ve been given 90 minutes and a whole lot of encouragement.  Now the ball is in their court, though my paternal instinct is still in the room.  I want to rush to their side and explain the right answer---but I can’t.  They’re on their own now.

Weird that teaching and parenting have much in common; weirder that I think that without any parenting experience.  But I teach these kids and then I let them go out on their own.  Hoping and praying that they’ll do well, that I did my job right and they’ve done theirs.  Teaching takes a lot of trust; I’m sure parenting takes even more.  But I care for these kids and I want them all to pass—to all succeed.

And that’s my favorite part of teaching psychology; even if the fail the exam, hopefully some of the more important points I’ll make this year (don’t mess with psychoactive drugs, don’t forget to sleep, don’t forget to relax and breathe, etc.) will be remembered.  Then I can be okay with this experience, then I can now that I’ve done some good.

And Today, Mark, the principal, wants to know about next year!  Could I really do this next year?  Would I want to?  I keeping saying I’ll head home and then go off somewhere else.  Will I? I have this feeling that I’m kinda good at this, even without any training whatsoever—minus being in school for almost all my life.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Johnny's Easy 36-step Pumpkin Pie

You will need:
sugar, salt, spices, eggs, pumpkin, spices, evaporated milk, shortening, milk, SPICES, water, patience, support of a friend, pandas, wax paper, skinny-fondant rolling pin, mother, e-mail, grocery store, yoga mat, Family Guy, spring-form pan, toaster oven, a sense of humor, a sense of hope, determination, anger management, spices, time, to be in China, and a therapist on call.

Step 1. E-mail mom to obtain recipie
Step 2. Realize that you forgot to e-mail for crust
Step 3. Spend 30mins google searching "Cross-the-bowl strokes" "boiling water" and "shortening" and other phrases you can pull out of your sleep brain
Step 4. Find potential crust recipe
Step 5. Realize that you're out of flour
Step 6. Return with flour, and a yoga-mat.
Step 7. Procrastinate making the crust (seriously?)
Step 8. In a much-to-small bowl, combine boiling water, shortening, and a tablespoon of strange vacuum-sealed milk; make sure to spill much of the contents on the counter
Step 9. Add 2 cups of partially-maybe-kinda sifted flour; make sure to cover previous spill with layer of flour.
Step 10. Chill the dough while watching Family Guy.
Step 11. In that same too-small bowl, combine very coarsely grained sugar (as it was the most identifiable as sugar) with salt, and vast amounts of cinnamon, ginger, cloves and additional pumpkin pie spice.
Step 12. Beat two impossible to crack Chinese eggs and stir in the spice mixture and pumpkin
Step 13. Gradually add evaporated milk, but not all of the can because it's too big.  But first forget it's too big, and then suddenly remember before it's too late.  This will make your pie experience more exciting.
Step 14. Roll out hopefully chilled dough with a tiny fondant-sized rolling pin.  Roll it out very very very wide as the pumpkin pie dish is a spring form pan on wax paper.
Step 15.  Somehow perform an amazing feat of flawlessly putting the crust into the pan
Step 16. patch up all the holes in the crust with reserved dough.
Step 17.  Continue to patch up more holes as fears that it will never be able to served start flooding your mind.
Step 18.  Pour pumpkin pie mixture into crust.
Step 19.  Put pie into toaster oven, slightly pre-heated.
Step 20.  Turn down toaster oven temperature after ten minutes.
Step 21. Notice steam/smoke from excess oil dripping from greasing the pan.
Step 22. FREAK OUT!
Step 23. Be reminded from a friend that it's just a pie and calm down...
Step 24 ...but only on the surface; remain anxious insdie for the next 2 hours as the pie slowly cooks
Step 25. turn on the top of the oven to "de-jellyfy" the top.
Step 26. TURN OFF THE TOP; the pie is souffle-ing!
Step 27.  Leave kitchen and swear at the pie
Step 28. Return to kitchen and apologize to the pie
Step 29. Start decorating apartment to get mind off pie.
Step 30. Forget about pie
Step 31. Remember the pie, run into kitchen, and insert knife into pie.
Step 32. Contemplate worshiping the toaster oven as the knife comes out clean
Step 33. Safely remove the pie
Step 34.  Try to explain to said friend that you didn't overreact at all during the past 4 hours.
Step 35. Bring pie to Thanksgiving potluck the next day and return with half of the pie!  Consider anger management for rage that NO ONE seemed as excited about the pie, but instead remember that there is now more pie for you.
Step 36. Enjoy delicious pumpkin pie!

Please note: making this pie without a toaster oven outside of China will not properly generate all of the necessary emotions required to fully enjoy eating the pie.

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Double Feature!

So this is a second post as I'm trying this new blog approach, by topic versus by day.  Let's face it, everyday of my life in China is not worth sharing and I feel silly blogging about it.  But some things stick out, like a taxi ride I had.

I was carrying a boxing bag (don't ask, please, I'm not sure why I bought it either) that I picked up from another foreigner--a nice Lebanese guy who works for an oil company and may be leaving Chengdu, but will probably be back.  He's a funny guy, bought a treadmill and bought "How I Met Your Mother" to start an exercise routine.  But he's in better shape than me, so he's doing something right.--  So there I am, lugging a large red bag and it's stand.  I can actually feel my shoulder muscles, a muscle I rarely, if ever, can feel.  I can't find a cab, the guy is gone, so I keep walking a couple meters, drop everything, rest, and repeat.  Stupidity has never felt so cruel.

And then there's a man in front of a hotel.  We get into a gesture conversation:
"Look how stupid I am lugging all this crap" (I gesture)
"Haha, yes, you are silly.  Is that for boxing?" (he gestures)
"Yes, yes it is." (I gesture)
Pause...
"It's really heavy, I can't find a cab?" (I try to gesture)
"Follow me" (he gestures)

And this is why you're kids should (or you) should take acting classes.  Cause someday, they might be in China!  "Oh, but my kids won't ever me in China" you say.  Well, talk to my parents.  They're just as surprised as I am.

So he leads me just to the curb where a taxi driver has seemingly refused to take another passenger.  And then there's the moment of truth.
"Where are you going?" (the driver asks, in Chinese, translation is simply guessed)
"International Community" (in Chinese!!!) "The street name?" ( I add in Chinese)
Get in (he gestures)
"Really?" (in English)
I thank the other man, and put all my stuff in the back.  So I sit in the front.


"Hello" I say (Chinese)
He smiles.
I gesture about the stuff and carrying it all...it's hard work.
He smiles.
"Foreigner" I say in a mocking tone of myself gesturing to the bag.
His eyes light up!  He laughs!
"What's your name?" (Chinese)
He responds by pointing to his name on the dash...it's in Chinese.
"Uh...."
He goes through the three characters with me.
"Where are you from?" he asks in Chinese.
"....."
"Where are you from" (English)
"USA"
"U...S...A..."
"Yes" (in Chinese) "Where are YOU from" (I ask in English)
He gestures he won't tell, probably because I won't know.  Which is probably true.
Then he goes on and on in Chinese about something and says foreigner a bunch of times and then says Zhonghai international community a bunch of times.
Oh, he wants me to say it?
"Zhonghai international community" (in Chinese I say)
He repeats as before.
I repeat as before.
"Correct" He says (in Chinese)
Then we go over the street name; this guy is giving me a Chinese pronunciation lesson.  I make a mental note that the Chinese like when foreigners use self-deprecating humor.  Perhaps a way in in future situations.

This was the LONGEST conversation I've been able to keep in Chinese/bits of English.  Then he pulls out his phone and calls a friend.  Something about driving this foreigner to Zhonghai, which is far.  Maybe he's complaining?  He sees a young boy in a car next to us and comments in Chinese.  I gesture/ask if he has a son.  He does.  So he calls his wife and I can hear the son in the background.  Apparently EVERYONE must know that there's a young foreigner in his car trying to speak Chinese.  The wife laughs, the son laughs, I laugh.  I laugh, though, for my safety.  He's driving sooo fast and we keep almost hitting other cars.   You know those movie scenes where two big bussed are merging towards itself and the hero/heroine is flooring it between them in a small car? Yeah we were that small car. 
I gesture a steering wheel and say:
"Very good" (in Chinese)
"NOOOOO!" (in English)
Yep, he's a Dad.  At least he knows, he drives dangerously.  But we arrive safely to Zhonghai.  I am grateful because he actually took me seriously.  Sometimes when I try to speak Chinese (and I don't know hardly any) I just get disinterest.  So it was nice finally be heard AND understood.

Makes me want to spend my free time learning more; but Thanksgiving is this week.  I'm attending two and I'm baking something every night.  Already have two loaves of pumpkin bread; one a whole lot more whole than the other.  I will learn how to beat this toaster oven.  And I will hopefully learn more Chinese...just, not now.  There's baking to be done.  This is serious business you know.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Rockstar

China, you're crafty.
Whenever I loose faith in you as I watch people not help in accidents (due to some strange laws) or as I get yelled at on a bus for loosing my footing (because 200+ people shouldn't be on a bus), you send someone to make me laugh and feel like a rock star/movie star.

Today, as I was getting my brand-new (soon-to-be-stolen) bicycle assembled after having a hectic day teaching, two Chinese university students came up to me:

"You are so smart"

"Smart? Why do you think I'm smart? I just bought a brand-new bicycle, that's not smart"

They laugh, then:

"No, I mean, you are so handsome!"

"Oh..."

They giggle and walk-away looking back every ten seconds or so.

This whole interaction is starting to feel normal AND I'm proud to say, I'm never expecting them to say handsome.  That's right, I get told on a weekly basis by some girl or guy on the street that I am handsome (or I hear someway say the foreigner is cute in Chinese) and I still get awkward every-single-time!  Which is far better than the alternative of becoming vain about it.  But damn, it's not so bad getting a self-esteem boost by random strangers.  China is...very blunt.  I have a feeling if they thought I wasn't handsome, I'd know that too.  In the US, if you think a stranger's cute, you don't generally comment to them; you may tell your friend after you pass.  In China, they tell you!  At first I thought maybe they want something from me, but no, they just want to tell you what they think--then they leave.  Maybe if they knew more English they'd stay, but I think it's really just part of the culture--or at least part of the culture towards foreigners.  They're aren't many foreigners my age here; so my youth is a rarity.

When Cynthia and I were exploring a Tibetan neighborhood and an old Chinese neighborhood, I posed for several pictures; Cynthia often declined.  I must be in like 200 pictures now.  My students have some of me; people on the street; and people from my brief travels.  And yet, when I want to take a picture of a man dressed in Tibetan robes, I get awkward?  But often the Chinese will shy away from the camera...not fair!

Also: whenever they say, "you are so handsome", it always seems to come out: "you are...SOHANDSOME" So handsome being a bit louder, very fast, and all one word.  Which never ever fails to make me blush.  Stop it China, you're too kind.  You're pretty fly yourself.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Oh...I'm staying in China

So I've accepted I'm in China, but now I'm struggling to understand that I'm staying here for a bit.  I've never been out of the US for Halloween before and it came and passed without me really thinking about it much.  But now Thanksgiving is approaching.  Thanks to Marissa, I have been away from my family on Thanksgiving once before and survived, but I still had a proper Thanksgiving dinner.  Mark is organizing Thanksgiving; and thanks to my Mom, I now have heaps of pumpkin and pumpkin pie spice!  So there will be pumpkin pie (even if I have to go to war against my toaster oven) and pumpkin bread.

And then there's Christmas.  Which I was reminded of while listening to Christmas music on repeat in IKEA of all places!

I've NEVER missed Christmas.  I've NEVER not woken up in my bed in my room in my parent's house.  I've been sick on Christmas, yes, but never so so far away.  It feels weird too, that my dog won't be celebrating Christmas with us either.  As she lived to be 15, I don't really remember Christmas without her.  So between the two of us, we've changed the holiday for our family.  And THAT is what feels weird and a bit unfair for them.  Today I was daydreaming of somehow showing up on Christmas day to a very surprised brother and parents.  But that really isn't possible.  I've seen Trains, Planes, and Automobiles and China to Chicago just seems like it would be a three-part epic; maybe even with alternate endings.  Christmas is a Sunday, and I'll be teaching that Monday.  Because somehow...I'm a grown-up?  Okay I'm laughing too, don't worry...I'm still Johnny; just stuck-in-China Johnny.

It's just weird, you know?  Knowing that I chose this.  And don't get me wrong, I do want to be here...but maybe, oh I don't know, maybe I didn't really think it through.  A year is a long time.  And then I think, how did people do this before the Internet?  Like when our parents generation backpacked through Europe.  Man, they couldn't even post pictures or blog!  And then I start feeling okay, even almost normal.  I'll be there for Thanksgiving.  I mean I won't lie, I wish Steve Jobs had finished the "sending food" ap.  I mean this was Roald Dahl's work: Willy Wonka could transfer chocolate!  But I suppose the side effects of eating computer generated food might put a strain on this already strained stomach.  And I'll be home for Christmas, though I won't be able to smell the tree.  But I'll be there.  As long as there's wi-fi at the relatives house, I may even sing for Santa.  I'll get to see my cousin's new baby.  I'll get to wish my parents and brother Merry Christmas face-to-face and that, that is what I want for Christmas.  In fact, while I'm at this trying-to-make-life-better-quest, being physically away from my family and friends, may actually bring me closer.  It sure brings a lot of clarity and forgiveness.  Forgiveness for old grudges, and more so, forgiveness for the self.  Of all those silly things I've done without thinking..."Like China?" you ask.  "No, China doesn't count.  I did think--for a week!"  And yes, I do see your point.   :)

Technology can feel so cold sometimes, but it can also provide such warmth.  Now I can't wait for Christmas.  It will be different, but I think it may just be the most meaningful one yet.  And perhaps, that's what I need this year in my life: more meaning.

Is that why I'm in China? Gosh, who knows!!!

Monday, November 14, 2011

Running For Buses

Running for Buses.   If I write a script, this would be the title for this experience (an indie film, of course).  Because even in the US when you run for a bus, you feel silly (a common feeling for me in China).  Everyone on the bus is watching you wondering if you'll make it and then you might or you might not.  Well in China, except for maybe two exceptions, I've never made it.  Even if I get there before the bus leaves, often the driver just looks at me and shakes his head.  Usually though the driver sees me running, and then leaves.  "It's not rude, it's just the culture," I tell myself over and over.

The alternate title is "Boxing For Buses".  This refers to when I am at the station waiting (not running) for a bus calmly with grannies, babies, children, and adults.  As soon as the bus pulls up, calm fades.  It becomes a mad rush for the bus.  Elbows out.  Eyes full of determination.  If a young Chinese man boxes out grandma, so be it.  If grandma boxes out a five-year-old, so be it!  What really gets me is this behavior happens at the FIRST STOP, when the bus is empty!  But the prize seats are the ones in the back as if one sits in the front, one will probably have to relinquish the fought-over seat for a senior citizen or mother-and-child.  So it matters, oh does it matter!

So this morning, when I ran to a bus and failed to get on board, I calmly waited with the others.  When the bus showed up everyone started forming the queue, which in China is just a mass of people competing for the starting point.  And there I was, the laowai (foreigner), being the gentle giant and being boxed out by grandma.  I need to learn to be more aggressive, though keep in mind this isn't aggressive, this is just the way things are here.  But usually, I don't want those seats as much as the others and fall to the end of the line.  Only a couple times have I had to box out.  And then I'm left feeling like I overacted. Maybe I'll learn.

Quick overview of LAST week:


SUNDAY
--woke up not feeling sore at all, which was confusing.  Shopped and wasted most of the day.  Spent far too long watching youtube trailers.  Then watched audition tapes.  Then suddenly I was reading/performing monologues in my apartment alone, excited that I could generate watery eyes for sad moments.  THEN, an existential crisis about life and China and what's I'm doing here.  Then determination that I should move to LA this week and just leave.  Then face-timing with surprised parents and calming down.  Resolving thought: I want to go act and will, just not now.  The desire is so big it'll eat me up if go and fail!  Need to learn more from life!

MONDAY
--Worked at Dipont
--showed NY Times Magazine article that Dad sent to office.  Generated great discussions with Lily, I'm better understanding my role here and the pressures.  Lily said no grades are ever changed her, which means some parents pull their kids and use different college services.


TUESDAY
--3 new kids showed up to my class.  They act like it's a joke and they may be trouble for me.
-- Confronted my class about plagiarism/academic dishonesty.  Tears were shed, not my best moment.  But all three kids suspected, admitted truth about getting outside help on a personal essay.  The kicker was that it wasn't a hard assignment.  But still, anger = never ever again in class.  Not fun, lesson learned.
--Felt like a (college) counselor.  Broke one of the Senior 1 classes into small groups to discuss passions, interested, and a light dash of college. The kids are only 15!  Good conversations were generated, which gave me insight and some points to raise to parents on Friday.

WEDNESDAY
--Spent the class day talking about plagiarism, overreactions, and gave an apology.  Two of the suspected students apologized for their dramatic behavior.  Class feels better, we discussed their essays and the need to eliminate "fluff".
-purchased Necessary Roughness from a cart.  Watched three episodes with Cynthia.  The show is about a cognitive behavioral psychologist getting a new job with a NYC sport team.  Makes me want to be a sport psychologist...now.

THURSDAY
--GREAT CLASS.  Best day of teaching to date.  We started discussing the nervous system.  Covered neuron structure (soma, dendrite, axon, myelin sheath, axon terminal buttons), and neurotransmitters.  Suddenly the kids were interested as I related Black Widow venom to ACh (thanks Professor Bean); MSG to glutamate, and salmon to serotonin.  It was fun!  The power point was good and worked!  Students even asked questions!
--Hung out with Sarah and her mother for dinner.

FRIDAY
--It would've been another great class, but I was almost late and my computer wouldn't connect in the room for the powerpoint.  But we finished the chapter and the students seem to get it
--Parent meetings!  I talked after Mr. Wang and Mark, to all Senior 2 parents and all Senior 1 parents.  I covered that preparing for college is stressful.  I had the parents raise their hand if they went to college (most did) and then those parents who studied in the US to raise their hands (no hands).  My message was one of support.  We all support your kids, we ask that you do the same.  If we all work together, your child will end up at a school he or she likes and you'll get the postcard home, thanking you for support.  I said the second half of that only to the Senior 1 parents and received applause.  Obviously, I made up the whole speech while speaking, but both went well.  Again, thank you acting classes.
--Pizza!  Instead of going out for pizza, Cynthia and I put our heads together and ended up with homemade pizza.  Delicious!  After that, we found the energy and went out.  On the way downtown, our cab ran out of battery and died.  So Cynthia and I pushed the cab from the middle of the road to the side and grabbed another.  The 1st cab driver ran to us and told the 2nd driver where we wanted to go and was very thankful to the laowai.  We met up with Steve, met Michael and Mary.  And boy, do these study abroad kids go hard.

SATURDAY
--woke up around 1:30pm and my first thought: "Did my high school teachers go out like this?"
--went to IKEA which was strangely uncrowded (still busy) for a Saturday and blasting American Christmas music.  I must have heard Rudolph at least twenty times, but I acquired baking tins!  Pumpkin pie is now a go.  I decided against the fake X-mas tree...it's November!

SUNDAY
--Made it to the big market at the North Railway Station where I should have brought my camera.  Full of people, food, clothes, decor, and more!  Purchased a cheap rug and some holographic pictures.

MONDAY
--swear I'll keep up better with this blog, and maybe try not so much in the future to focus on a list of what I did (see above) but more feelings/thoughts about what I'm doing.  More like the beginning of the entry.  But that will take blog discipline and more frequent posting.
--STEVE.  New Physics teacher supposed to be at my place now, but isn't.  Something about baggage expense and not having enough cash.  He's coming from Singapore and staying with me for a night? Maybe more?  Not sure.  We'll see if he gets here, but my whole place is clean with anticipation.

Maybe I'll have better bus luck home.  Always a battle.  Battle for Buses? We'll see...

Emei Shan


So Florence + The Machine have a new album.  And it’s awesome.  You should probably be listening to it.  Now.
Also, one of my dear cousins just had a baby!  A healthy baby girl, though my Internet is not working currently, which is frustrating because I’d like to know more!

Anyways, to continue where I left off…

I awoke Thursday early to an annoying cell phone alarm.  “You’ve got to be kidding me.”  Nah, I’m not going mental, I’m just talking to my past self who packed a tramping bag like a mad man only a few hours prior.  I didn’t feel great, so I lay in bed…thinking; something I do far too much for my own good.  I wanted to climb Emei Shan, but it was supposed to rain, I knew I didn’t know much Chinese, I knew I was going alone, and I was stuck.  I was stuck in the bed for about forty minutes.  Suddenly going to Emei Shan felt like a big life decision.  If I went, I would be trying to find that person in me who fearlessly jumped from a plane and hitchhiked.  If I slept in, I would be a teacher exhausted by his new circumstances and probably waste the day and post-pone the difficult work of rebuilding the self that needs to be done.

Well, I procrastinate enough about teaching.  So I jumped out of bed, took a shower to wake up, ate a very quick breakfast, and walked to the bus stop.  The bag was heavy, too heavy, but I was on an adventure and so excited about it that I fell asleep on the bus.  I was exhausted; I had dragged my sleepy tired body out of bed, put on a huge pack, and laced big boots around my feet.  The mind wanted to go, the body wanted the mind to go…alone.

After what felt like forever, I ended up at the long-distance bus stop.  I went up to the counter and was able to get a ticket to Emei Shan.  The only time on the ticket was 16:45!  But something told me not to worry, so I went into the station found the gate and waited, until a Chinese woman asked me where I was headed (in English) and it turned out there was one seat on a bus boarding at that moment!  (Apparently you buy a seat for the day and just need to get on a bus when you feel like it).  It worked wonderfully, language barrier passed, right?

WRONG! 2 hours later found me over-thinking as people kept getting of the bus.  I thought the bus went to one station!  What was this?  So I did what foreigners do, I stumbled like a mad man from the back seat of the bus to the front, tripping over people, to try and pronounce Emei Shan to a bus driver who gave me the stiff arm.  I thought it was only 1.5 hours away, and too much time had gone by, and I was tired, and blah blah blah, you get it!

And then a magical thing happened; we pulled into a station and the bus stopped.  And the station said Emei, the town where I wanted to go.  Suddenly I was overjoyed.  It was now around 1:00, much later than I had planned on arriving and the joy faded.  Crap---still need to get to the mountain.  A man outside the bus asked me “Emei Shan?  30! 30! 30!”  I politely declined, got out the Rough Guide and then realized I didn’t want to deal with two more buses, 30 yuan sounded so much easier.  So I got into a strange man’s van and another man jumped in and we set of for the town at the base of the mountain.

We pulled into an alleyway between two buildings.  Apparently we were there.  I didn’t see a mountain.  This was SO much easier when I could communicate!  I asked him/gestured to him: Which way for Emei?  He pointed.  I walked.  I asked another guy, who pointed the other way.  Seeing as the other way seemed to lead to a waterfall and an entrance, I picked the second guy’s advice.  Thank you good instincts!  So I found my mountain.  And then proceeded to spend 20 mins trying to find a bathroom as the signs kept pointing in different directions!

Finally I found it, and changed out my sweats into some hiking pants; performing an incredible circus-balancing act over a hole-toilet without touching sock to foul floor while changing!  Johnny: 1; Hole-in-floor: 0.  Great success.  Finally I was ready to begin hiking around 1:40 or so.

I took a picture of the map, instead of buying a map, and had one in the guidebook (that happened to be a bit lacking of information as it turned out).  So then I needed to find the trail.  After only ten minutes, I picked a path that led me face-to-face with a Taoist temple.  Yeah that’s cool and all, but it was almost 2pm and I wanted to find a place to stay on the Mt.  Sorry Taoism, I’ll learn about you later.  Felt bad to rush but I still wasn’t sure where I was going or where I was even trying to get to?  After ten minutes of walking, I looked exasperated to a woman and then gestured stairs and she pointed the way I was walking!  So I kept walking.  And then…I saw the bridge.

The bridge was a humble bridge full of color from dozens of prayer flags.  Instantly, I woke up all over again.  This time I wanted to go on an adventure: mind and body.  Two more bridges followed.  Then after some flights of stairs, I came to my first temple.  Incense burned at the entrance.  It felt calm.  Then I noticed the entrance fee.  Sure it was only 6, which is less than a US dollar, but an admission fee for a Buddhist temple feels wrong.  Asking for donations feels different.

So I took my moment of pause and caught up with a girl who I had greeted while going up the steps.  She seemed lost, I was lost, and she was an Aussie!  Meet Jess, the 22-year-old who also teaches in Chengdu; vivid blue eyes, large frame glasses, and a warm smile.  She was energetic about life, though a tad ill-prepared: left her big bag at the hostel (my back was jealous), though she carried a large water bottle, a camera on her wrist, and a large bag of potato chips.  Together we caught a ride to the next temple (being ferried over a muddy road due to construction).  So we started climbing to the next one.

Jess greeted everyone we passed with a warm “ni hao”.  Though Jess could actually say much more.  She’s only been here a month longer than me!  She dropped out of university as she wasn’t enjoying it and is now on an internship teaching in China after spending a year saving funds.  To say her company was pleasant would be an understatement.  I think I was also in shock about finding a same-age, likeminded person.  We reached the temple and Jess got us into a conversation with a young French boy and his sister and mother.  They’ve lived all over and as I watched Jess, I was reminded of stories told about my Nana, whose socializing skills were legendary.  I’ve inherited much of them it seems, but Jess was right up there with my Nans.

Jess was willing to keep climbing with me, even though she had her bag in a hotel at the bottom, meaning she was going to need to return to the bottom.  The task of getting to the next landmark, a palace, involved many many many stairs.  Stairs would become the norm for the next two days.  If 10 feet is a story (or there abouts), and I was planning on ascending 8,000ft then that’s about, 800 flights of stairs.  Granted the stairs changed; sometimes steep, sometime big ones that slowly ascended.  And then of course, my favorite, descending hundreds of feet via stairs while trying to go up the mountain!

We finally found the palace.  No entrance fee so we walked in and had some quiet time.  I saw an accommodation sign, but wanted to get farther on my first night.  Jess was still willing to keep going, but was not in the rush I felt I was in.  Then, after continuing a ways, we met Sherry and Carol.  Both Chinese and both 23; together they could understand us!  They were hiking all the way to the top and I wanted to join their party.  They were headed for the temple I was trying to maybe get to that night and Jess had no choice but to continue as we had started descending.  Jess very much wanted to stay at a temple, but having booked the room wasn’t sure she would.  Noticing how much she enjoyed the girls’ company I encouraged her to come with us.

We talked about various things.  Carol taught me the words for many things, of which I remember little.  Eventually evening came, and we reached a bus stop where Jess could catch a bus back.  But we pressed on through village over a lake, crossed some neat bridges (all not photographed due to lack of light), and eventually to the temple.  A lady who wanted us to stay at her house agreed to show us to the temple.  Sherry and Carol wanted to stay with her, while Jess and I decided to stay at the temple.  We parted ways but exchanged numbers.

The monks (or staff, not so sure) prepared us some dinner for additional funds, but the lodging was 30 per person.  I had read about mats on floors and cold, damp rooms and had brought my sleeping bag, sleeping bag mat, and sleeping bag sheet along with warm clothes, gloves, hat, etc.  It sounded like we were going to sleep in separate quarters as well.  But we were escorted to a room with two beds that even seemed clean.

Jess had no supplies so I offered her my sleeping bag and I used my sheet with two comforters; not too trusting about Chinese beds: I wonder why?  Jess and I talked parents, siblings, US politics, life, etc.  She was relived to hear that I had similar concerns over the US.  We talked about the culture of fear that seems to often control a lot of our governments: US and Aussie.  And finally, it was bedtime.

After hiking Abel Tasman with friends in NZ where we’d hike until dark, I insisted with Jess that we wouldn’t go to bed at 8!  We had to stay up until at least 10, otherwise after a few days I knew I’d be exhausted from all the sleep; trust me, it happens.

We awoke late.  Or later than anticipated.  After a small breakfast of a banana and some wheat crackers, we found Carol and Sherry at the temple.  I braved the temple bathroom (hole-in-the-ground) and we continued on our way.

Jess had to leave out party, so Carol, Sherry, and I set our sights up…on plenty of stairs.  Big stairs, fat stairs, small stairs, skinny stairs; I’m gonna climb some stairs!  And climb we did.  The first temple we paused at was home to Garfield!  An orange rather chubby cat warmly greeted us; its behavior far more dog-like than cat-like.  Carol’s heart was moved, which is an easy feat if you’re a cute hungry animal, and she generously shared some of her rations.  Of course, then a cleaner came by and scooped up the rations.  Even on the way up Emei Shan, everything is still cleaned!  In fact, we passed many leaf-cleaners, raking all the stairs.

We passed stall after stall selling beads and food, though eventually they thinned out between temples.  We broke for a bit of lunch: some PB&J, Carol’s generous rations, an apple, and some water.  We stopped by a woman’s home/store.  Two cats, a mother and kitten, shared in our lunch; especially Carol’s!

After many more hours of stairs, we bumped into two guys.  One I dubbed the red-musician as he wore a red fedora and just looked like a musician.  The other was dubbed musician’s friend; creativity was not very high.  They joined our party though they knew no English, so I had a bit of fun attempting to communicate.

Eventually we came across monkey-row.  After seeing signs for hours, and passing through a temple with monkey statues, we finally found our monkeys!  Warned that they are aggressive thieves, we used our sticks to scare them from our path…while other visitors feed them.  I must have seen a hundred signs about not feeding the monkeys, but maybe in Chinese they say the opposite?  They were very clever—opening up water bottles and other goodies—though it was also a bit sad seeing how they were treated.

We pressed onward with dusk falling and came to our stopping point: a home/hotel across from a temple.  They were the same price as the temple (unless you were a pilgrim…though it was a bit vague as to how one would prove he or she was a pilgrim…hoping there’s not a membership card).  We ate, talked, and feel asleep on heated blankets; though I was wide-awake most of the night: too warm to sleep, even if the air in the room was freezing.

6:00AM came too soon, as it often does, and we continued in darkness to the top.  First it seemed that we might catch the fabled sunrise, which lights up and over the famed sea of clouds.  Then as we climbed higher, the cloud around us became even thicker.  Sure enough, at the top it was rainy, cloudy, and light; we’d missed the sunrise through the haze.  Maybe it was the lack of sleep, or my diet, but I did not feel good.  I wanted to go down.  Now.

Instead, I visited the temple; the goal of all those stairs.  I offered up a pear-thing that I brought from Chengdu and sat to meditate.  A man at a desk murmured something.  Carol told me I couldn’t sit, I had to kneel.  WHAT?  Is this not a Buddhist temple?  Can’t I meditate?  Apparently Chinese Buddhism is a bit different than Tibetan.  So I kneeled.  But I wasn’t about to pray to a gold statue.  So I meditated.  Another love and kindness meditation; at 10,000 plus feet.  After, my mood pulled a 180-turn and suddenly, even the rainy clouds were good.
I read that a path/railway led to the final summit, but it was closed due to weather/season.  So we descended.  Everyone seemed bummed, but I felt at peace.  Then, only after twenty minutes, I looked up and saw…could it be?  Blue sky.  Just a small patch.  I called out to the others.  After starring at the sky waiting and wondering, a couple more patches tore from the overcast sky.  We turned and climbed again.

This time, the rain had stopped and then…we could see!  Not much, as the sea of clouds was thick under us, but we could see the sea of clouds!  The gold of the golden summit glowed.  It was beautiful.  My attitude soared even higher.  After we’d taken in all we could, and I’d tried to take pictures with a Kodak camera that just really doesn’t suit me, we headed back, but not before I had posed with several people for pictures.

Going down was difficult.  The steps are smaller than my big boots and the legs were sore.  Of course the steps were also slippery.  I wiped out only once, on flat stone luckily, but I was glad to finally reach the final bus stop (1.5 hours or so from the top.)  We took a car down, instead of a bus.  No, not a taxi, a car.  He drove us all the way down the steep, narrow, switchback road, and, of course, passed other cars on the way!

After almost two hours we were back in Emei town eating noodles on the street before saying goodbye to the boys and busing back to Chengdu.  Carol, Sherry, and I admired the small farms, rice paddies, and tea steps on the way back.  Back at the bus station, I said goodbye to Carol and Sherry and thanked them for all their help.  And then, like any American, I found pizza hut!

Eventually I made it back to my place.  The adventure was just what I needed.  Post the adventure; I’m better at waking up and thinking “I’m in China.”  And that morning smile usually lasts until bedtime; very similar to my NZ experience.  Minus the whole job thing.

(Chinese Buddhism has been capitalized; which makes sense with the large atheist population.  Tourists are more common than pilgrims.  Still, the Chinese have done a good job of preserving their past; even if they fix it up a bit to make it more attractive.)

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Canned Pumpkin

Tuesday found me wanting to go to USC because I sat in on Megan's, from USC, pitch to the Senior 1s and a couple Senior 2s.  I learned all about USC and by the end, was sold...then I realized I've already gone to college!  Weird to be back in that audience.  I was a bit embarrassed that no one in the audience seemed to have a dream or a goal in life when asked to share.  Guess that's what I'll work on during my Tuesday evening college talks: goals and dreams (besides making money).

So, the Senior 3 students were gone this past week as the other students had midterms.  Which meant, I was freeeeeeeeee!  For whatever reason Mark didn't schedule me to proctor.  Cynthia and I discussed maybe climbing the other peak at Qingcheng Shan or maybe seeing the Panda center (where something like 30% of the world's Panda's live!) on Wednesday (and she was off for the day).

But on Wednesday, at 7am, when we said we'd do something, we both slept in!  So eventually we dragged ourselves out and about!  I spent the morning researching Emei Shan and other adventure ideas for my next few days of no-teaching.  Though staying in Chengdu also sounded nice: relaxing, learning more bus routes, and planning classes.

Cynthia and I bussed #30 to Tianfu Square and we walked to the bus station for long distance buses.  There was a big picture sign of all the places to go (which reminded me of Dr. Suess's Oh, The Places You'll Go; which reminded me I am in China, such a cool place to go!).  Cynthia thought we could just hop on a bus and go anywhere, but without cameras and my desire to investigate some things in Chengdu, I declined.  I want to be that impulsive, but I liked to have a tiny bit of supplies when being that impulsive!

We walked down one of the main drags and ended up at Bookworm; a foreign library/coffee shop/restaurant.  It was cozy, they had pumpkin pie on their menu, and free Chengdu maps in English/Chinese!  I grabbed a couple for me and other teachers and Cythina and I ordered a bit of food.  Her hummus appetizer left much to be desired: flavor.  I had a tomato, pesto, mozzarella sandwich on focaccia.  The pesto was decent, the mozzarella was actually real, but the focaccia was more like white bread, no good crunch.  But the fries (chips) served were delicious!  We discussed careers as food writers, but realize we'll eat what we ordered unless it's really really really bad.

Then Cynthia showed me Sabrina's Country Store, which is a foreign import store.  There I found allspice, cloves, nutmeg (all ground), wax paper, cocoa powder, crisco baking sticks (pie crust), and CANNED PUMPKIN!  Sure it was all a bit too expensive, but what's a guy to do?  Thanksgiving is coming fast and I refuse to not eat pumpkin pie.  All that's left is an oven-proof pie plate and evaporated milk and I'm good to go!  (For whatever reason the pie plate I purchased, had a booklet that said in English that it can't go into a pre-heated oven.  Which I found after removing all labels and washing it.  What a silly piece of glass!!!)  Making a pumpkin pie in an electric oven will be interesting, but hopefully will be successful!

Also, if I failed to mention, I already possess heaps of cinnamon.  In fact I have a flour jar and I have a cinnamon jar...what else would I need?  And today, I was given a small PUMPKIN PIE by the Korean woman who runs a small shop that has butter and cheese and real milk close to where I live!  I bought frozen bagels the first time from her.  She's pretty fly!

After Sabrina's, Cynthia and I stopped for a 'bathroom stop' at Shamrock, the Irish Bar (every city has an Irish bar, even in China??).  Of course bathroom stop is Kiwi for mojitos (though it was probably my idea)! But it was five o'clock, so it was fully justified.  We resumed our quest for food sources and stopped at Auchon, a French store that boasts a large international section and also sells decently prices liquor.  I grabbed a couple things including some Capt. Morgan Rum.  (My dear cousin  Xanna once mentioned something about one our ancestors being a pirate of sorts.  Never fully explored, it has still heavily influenced by drink of choice.  That and Pirates of the Caribbean...oh media, you powerful force!  Part of me also thinks that this movie actually started the news media's obsession over pirates.  --Ever the psychology major/over-thinker.)

Finally we found ourselves home and combined forces to make pasta with tomato sauce and heat up (toast!) breaded fish...that still had scales on it...underneath the breading...and was very old and smelly and NOT eaten.  Lynette joined us for a brief visit.

I had talked about maybe going to Emei Shan the next day and Cynthia was encouraging me the whole day.  I hemmed and hawed.  I wasn't feeling my best, having a case of the stomach abroad! (Dun dun Dunnnn!)  And then I, while talking to Cynthia, I realized: I've jumped out of a plane.  Actually, I hitchhiked with a friend to a hostel, found it, and then the next day jumped out of a plane and hitched back.  What happened to all that confidence to travel?  I'll tell you: language barrier!  Consciously I'm not scarred of it, but I think it was the source of the hemming and hawing.  In New Zealand, I could hitchhike alone and feel secure, because of the same language.  Here in China, I am apprehensive to get on a bus out of Chengdu!  A bus which has a destination and a plan makes me apprehensive all because I can't speak.  Sure I can say a little and gesture a lot, but it's all so new.

Cynthia left late and around twelve I had decided to go.  I needed to do this for myself.  I needed to pull myself out of this helplessness feeling and go have an adventure: it's like the cure for the common case of anxiety.  So there I was at 12:30AM frantically putting supplies on my table, making sandwiches, and gathering warm clothes.  Finally I relaxed into sleep around 1:30, though I still wasn't sure if I would go.  All depended on how I felt in five and half hours (to be continued).


Pumpkin, cinnamon, cocoa powder, Italian herbs, and more are very much helping this place feel homey.  I hope to stick to mostly Chinese food and really live like they do, but it's nice to feel I have a home base stocked with pasta sauce!  Now to work on that teaching!